Thursday, December 27, 2007

Oh Hell No! Raz-B Recants!!!

So look what just surfaced online today! 3 days after the Videos with the accusations were posted this formal apology is posted. After being subject to sexual molestation for years he is forced into silence once again. Sad. Shame on you Chris Stokes and your enablers! I am disgusted.



What the hell is this? They think we're all stupid and can't tell this is a blatant lie! Watching this video it Raz-B looks like he has a gun against his head and reading from a teleprompter or something. There is are dark shadows under his eye lids either he has not slept in days or he got beat up. I am not sure what they were hoping for this video to do but to me it makes the allegations seem all the more true.

Be strong...I really hope justice can be served on this one. It seems to me like lawyers and a big bag of money were involved in this one.

Anybody out there reading?

So I have been blogging all of 3 weeks now is anyone listening? If so Please leave a comment it will be much appreciated!

Much Love
LIB

Post Christmas Recovery

Christmas is one of the very most stressful times of year and it is good sometimes to just take a break. I am having some juice spiked with some Chardonnay which is making me feel rather receptive! But most people don't let up until they are about to pass out or are too drunk to care. I hope everyone had a enjoyable Christmas I sure did. I don't know what got into me this year but I really got into Christmas. I remember in the past I have been so anti-Christmas that I refused to put up a tree or cook. I think I was probably just trying to be cool but I am a nice traditional yet liberal boy on the inside.

My family was much more tolerable although at first I regretted coming home. I think my family is starting to relax and are treating me less like a child. It is a start but they have a long way to go. I really don't know what I should be saying here right now but I really would like to continue to blog. I am looking forward to New Years Eve now! Maybe I will get a kiss from a handsome boy! Who knows...Muah!

Tuesday, December 25, 2007

Merry Christmas!

Happy Birthday Dude!
...now bust a move!


Well it is that time of the year again to spend time with family and friends. It can be a very stressful time but I really would like everyone to stop trying so hard to make everything "perfect" and just kick back and relax because it's Christmas! "It's the most wonderful time of the year!"
Merry Christmas to you all God Bless!
...and Santa finally gets to take a break!

Monday, December 24, 2007

Chris Stokes Issues Statement

Chris Stokes and wife Monyee Stokes

The sleazeball Chris Stokes Issues a Statement to deny deny deny...Chris Stokes and Raz-B formerly of B2K

“The accusations that Demario ‘Raz B’ Thorton and Ricardo Thorton have made are vehemently false and hold no merit,” Stokes said in a statement. “I have recently stopped financially supporting both individuals along with assisting them with their criminal and legal matters, which leads me to believe they are resentful and looking to benefit financially from this.

“My family is my first priority and the reason why I have been so supportive of them. In bringing these false claims, they have not only slandered me, they have also put me in a position to ensure that the truth is known and I will take all legal routes to protect myself, my family and my four children,” he continued.

During the calls, Raz is heard saying that Stokes “touched” him when he was a child, then later Ricardo is on the phone with who they claim to be Stokes who says that he “just don’t do that in my life no more.”

Also during the call, Ricardo is heard mentioning a recent event, held by Stokes, where they were denied entrance. Stokes confirmed this, further explaining, this may have cause the public accusations brought on by the pair.

“It’s also quite ironic that these statements were made only two weeks after they were denied admittance by a venue for an event I hosted in Beverly Hills,” Stokes said.

Source: Bossip.com

Response to Raz-B Video

Raz-B

B. Scott one of my favorite bloggers posted this video response to Raz-B's video. He echoed my feelings almost exactly. My prayers are with Raz-B and his fellow former band mates as they deal with this horrible situation.

'Grey's Anatomy' star Katherine Heigl weds in Utah

Katherine Heigl one of the stars of my Fav show on TV married musician Josh Kelley in a Utah ceremony witnessed by her "Grey's Anatomy" co-stars, entertainment news websites reported Monday.

Heigl and Kelly

The 29-year-old Emmy-winning and Golden-Globe-nominated star tied the knot in a private reception in Park City on Sunday in front of "Grey's" stars T.R. Knight and Sandra Oh, People.com reported.

Heigl, a former model who also starred in the hit comedy movie "Knocked Up", met Kelley, 27, in 2005 when appearing in a video for the musician's song "Only You."

All the Best Girl!!! God Bless

Raz B Speaks Out: B2K Molestation


Boy Band B2k

Well well well...this is some sad news. Raz-B, former member of the boy band B2K spoke out about being molested by his manager Chris Stokes in a video posted on you tube yesterday. In this video he admits that he and his brother Ricky Romance were molested by manager and cousin Chris Stokes. It started when he was only 11 years old! This is so very wrong on so many levels that I am so upset.





1. Sexual molestation is no laughing matter at 11 years old you can't defend yourself and doing something like this to a child is unforgivable. I believe in rehabilitation and so on but this shit is unforgivable! Chris Stokes belongs in JAIL!

2. Chris Stokes is Raz-B and Ricky Romance's COUSIN!. They put so much trust in Chris that they went along and did everything he said blindly. It is really painful to see this played out like this because the scars of sexual abuse stay with victims for the rest of their lives.

3. This whole situation is perpetuating the stereotype of gay men being pedophiles. This is totally not true Chris Stokes is a sick, sick, nasty man for doing this something really needs to be done immediately.

This is very very brave of Raz-B to come out and say this. It is alleged that they were forced to have sex orgies with people in the industry and each other. Raz-B says in the video that he did not like it because his ass hurt so much afterward. Also implicated in this whole thing is Marques Houston who was allegedly molested by Chris Stokes and seems to have continued the cycle with Omarion and the other B2K boys.
Chris Stokes and Marques Houston

I always heard rumours about them being gay and felt they were true but I never imagined something like this. So this brings to mind a rumour many years ago that Bow Wow was raped by a member of his management. Now he and Omarion are so close now...it makes me wonder if they aren't doing more than just the album and the Scream Tour together.

Anyways the rest of this is all speculation on my part but if all this is true then many people in the industry will be forced kicking and screaming out of the closet. I just hope this sexual abuse of children ends here.

Thursday, December 20, 2007

Home for the HOlidays

Well I have been home for 3 days so far trying to be normal and not let them drive me crazy. It is good to see everyone but today I really had to let it be known that I need some time for myself. It feels good to just have peace and quiet.

I am sexy and single men are you listening? I need to find a good man for some fun but I am not sure if it is in the cards for me. I was walking int he airport and I felt an overwhelming feeling of nothingness. It was not peace or joy it was just nothing. I know I am lonely island boy but this really is exhausting me! I would love to run off to New York...maybe next year!

I'm Back: What the heck?

I had to take a little time to relax a bit but now I am back. I will try to be more dedicated to blogging and hope someone starts reading.

Well I know I am late on commenting on this but Holy Spears! Jamie Lynn is Pregnant!I cannot believe that Britney's nice, cute, pint sized, non-psychotic sister got knocked up at 16. I was expecting Ashlee Simpson or Mary-Kate Olsen but never Jamie Lynn.The Spears family would make the best film ever! Some people are saying that Britney is going to pull a stunt to get back the attention from the tabloids. I think that the biggest thing Britney can do to take back news coverage is returning to the superstar spot she earned in pop music.

This is where my rant begins:

1. How can a parent allow a minor to have a live in boyfriend?

2. With all the money they have this girl couldn't afford some goddamn condoms! What the fuck? Unprotected sex is not cool even for straight people! I mean Pamela Anderson ad her Hepatitis C snatch are having unprotected sex with people and no one has a problem with that. But if it were gay men having unprotected sex their would be an uproar.

3. Shame on you Britney for the bad example you have displayed for your sister. You know Jamie Lynn was probably trying to show her sister up and made a little boo boo.

4. I am officially sick of celebrity pregnancy! Fuck does anyone have secret abortions anymore? Latest on the list is Lily Allen. I mean who's next...Paris Hilton?
People say Paris is dumb but guess who hasn't gotten pregnant? Girl knows how to use protection and "That's Hot!"

5. The case of Ms. JL Spears is proof that Abstinence Programs DO NOT WORK! President Bush please take note and stop wasting money to force your beliefs on others.

Sunday, December 9, 2007

Jingle Bells!

I am listening to Ella Fitzgerald so it’s Christmas and what a swinging Christmas it will be. I am feeling pretty good and in the spirit so much that I bought decorations and going to get it going.

However, the uncomfortable get-togethers have begun. So tonight I saw the guy I have a thing for and I pretended that I was not into him. I saw the last guy I fell in love with and his girlfriend. I pretend that I let it go but whenever I see him I think of all that could have been if we were together. The only good thing about it is that I know he is still my friend and was not weird after I confessed my love for him. The words “I’m sorry but it’s not reciprocated” really suck!


Back to current future baby daddy who may be a closet case or not know he’s gay yet. I caught him looking at me a couple of times but I am so afraid. I need a kiss, I need someone I don’t have to sneak around with and can love without having to hide my pleasure when in their presence. The fact that he makes me smile when he is near and his scent makes me want to hold on to him and kiss him gently does not make me bad does it?


As the song by The Dream and Rihanna goes “We out here livin’ a lie, out here livin’ a lie, livin’ a lie.” So sad I have to pretend so much just to have some sort of “normal” life. It makes me so sad to feel alone like this so often just because some stupid people won’t understand. I need to stop thinking about all this stuff it is really bringing me down.

Friday, December 7, 2007

Poetry Corner

What do I feel?

So many nights I have cried

So many days I have died slowly inside

In my not so comfortable zone

Spinning up and down, round and round to nowhere


Masking your sadness is the saddest thing

Neuroticism as a form of neurosis

Because it makes your life like bloody hell

I wish I could be happy again


Happy again sometimes I wonder if I ever was

Do I even know what it feels like?

Do I know what love is, what do I feel?

Do you feel loved tonight?


Why don’t I feel loved, do you love me?

Question is do I love myself?

Let me think about that for a second

Well maybe not, or just not enough

Good Night...Uh Morning

Yet another night early morning sitting here trying to read and I can’t concentrate. The birds began their morning chirp at 3:45 am this morning now I won’t be able to fall asleep for a while. I mean these birds are making more noise than they make during the day! No matter how much caffeine and candy I eat I can’t focus. In exactly one week I will be faced with a 120 question paper to complete. I probably should be studying more but I am pretending that it does not exist. I suppose I am reading and picking up stuff but I feel guilty for not spending each and every waking hour devoted to my books.

I am listening to Amy Winehouse’s Frank album. She is such an amazing talent but she is wasting away in a whirl wind of drugs, alcohol and big hair. I hope she makes more albums soon because at the rate she is going she won’t make it through the next decade. My love for the Wino runs deep but come on Amy eat something already! Jesus! Eat something popsicles are not real food.

Amy Winehouse needs an intervention

I am becoming increasingly anxious and a bit down for the time being. I really wish I could have an uncomplicated relationship…fingers crossed. I can’t afford to continue obsessing over men who will never return the love. No matter how I imagine being with them these future baby daddies will never come by way. I guess that’s why they are called future baby daddies…because that future will never be realized.

Thursday, December 6, 2007

play time fun or red flag?

I really should be studying at this point but I really don’t want to! I know it sounds like I should be doing something else besides blogging but come on what could be better than simply blogging away!


Okay Perez sorry for copying your post but this is interesting and leads right into a rant by me. Okay Sherri Shepard…chill out! This is the precise reason why gay, lesbian, bisexual, transgendered and questioning people have such a hard time growing up. This sentiment of the hegemonic male being the ideal for young boys needs to end. I know she did not say that but I know what she meant no matter how she tried to down play it.

Dressing up does not make a child gay or transgendered! It only means that your child has a great imagination and you should encourage them to maintain that spirit. That imaginative spirit will be an asset to your child when everyone else has had it pounded out of them by their early teens.

What Sherri is really saying here is that no child of hers no matter how much she loves them is going to make her look bad because that child is part of her legacy. Parents feel ashamed of their transgendered children because they are so caught up in the constraints of our society as it stands. If you really love your child you should talk to them and let them know that you love them no matter what.

If parents could just do that there would be fewer emotionally traumatized LGBT youth. That shame and guilt planted into the minds of children from birth takes years to overcome. I still have not overcome it and many out there will never recover. For the record I dressed up in both my parents’ clothes and pretended I was an adult. There was no sexual undertone I was simply playing pretend and that is healthy!

We teach our boys that they must be rough and tough and be a “real boy.” We have this social construct of the specific gender identify that says boys wear pants and girls wear dresses. We scold boys for wanting to play with dolls or experimenting in the kitchen and tell them that only sissies behave like that. After filling our boys with this fear they become incredibly guilty about liking anything that would be seen as too feminine. Then we complain 20-30 years down the road that men are this and that when we made them feel that they have to seem that way in the first place!

Men are incredibly afraid of dealing with life issues especially those of an emotional nature. I think men would be truly stronger if they were encouraged to tackle these issues head on. The real issue here is not LGBT people it is about society and its continual production of emotionally crippled men. If both men and women were truly seen as equal human beings there would be no need for this separation of socially acceptable behaviour.

I can go on and on about this issue but I won’t. What do you think?

Hmm...

I don't care what anyone say they are both the same song!!! Stargate what's going on?



Sounds Like?

Very similar beats....interesting



introduction

This is going to be a very interesting personal journey that I am going to embark upon. I have been repressed for many years and my true self has been kicking and screaming inside trying to be heard. But I’ve just always said everything that was the right thing to say and done all the right things to do. So this is the first step in my journey so bare with me on this. I’ve blogged in the past but have always censored myself in fear of being found out.

Anyways here it goes…

I am one of the most interesting people you will ever meet and trust me I am not just saying that. I am a writer, poet, singer, musician, actor, former model, photographer, designer, cook, current academic and former band geek and I just want to be loved! I happen to be an early 20 something closeted gay man who also happens to be from the Caribbean. Unique and drowning in a world of fake smiles, even faker friends and a steady supply of self-directed self-conscious, self-loathing criticism. I’ve secretly gone to therapy and apparently I am not crazy just experiencing feelings of loneliness rooted in existential isolation oh and my university faculty breeds mental illness in spades. I am in the middle of an examination period and I should be putting in my usual 10-12 hours a day but it just ain’t happening right now.

I feel better already maybe I can get the courage to stand up to my family and say NO I will not be controlled. Say fuck all you island homophobes and your warped view of the world. Courage what a word I wish there wasn’t the whole couRAGE part. Taking control of my happiness is a priority because I am tired of taking happiness only when it is given by someone else. I am the only person that can sustain my happiness so I should be the one generating it in the first place. I may just be able to do it anonymously for now but I hope I can be interesting enough to that people would actually enjoy reading about me and my lonely island boy life.